A few weeks, or – at the latest – one month later... The impulse is long gone, daily life and routines take over, your willpower is weakening day by day… Before you know it, you are back to square one. There is always an excuse… I’m too tired, too restless, family visits, no time, I will just skip one day and do it tomorrow, I will start for sure – next week… Does this ring any bells?
Why is it that we so often start a process, yet are unable to finish it?
If we take the Enneagram as a model, every process consists of nine main phases. Here, as an example – the making of a chocolate cake (Yum!):
Waiting for an impulse (9 fragile harmony). You are going to have guests (1 desire, intention) and you decide to make a chocolate cake. You check what ingredients you still have at home (2 effort) and get the rest from the shops (3 action, impulse from the outside). You mix the ingredients (4 creation, refining) and put the cake in the oven (5 transformation). If the cake is ready (6 feedback), you take it out. You decorate the cake (7 innovation, manifestation) and receive appreciation for the result (8 control, enjoyment). The cake has been eaten, harmony is restored and you are waiting for a new impulse (9 harmony).
Now, that seems pretty doable, right? Well, yes and no. The enneagram is an expression of different laws (the law of one (green circle), the law of three (red triangle), the law of seven (the blue irregular hexagram)). In order to complete a process, you have to travel through the enneagram 3 times along the hexagram. Every time the blue hexagram crosses the red triangle, something shifts in the energy of process. This means that you have a grand total of 36 (!) opportunities to mess it up! And suddenly it all starts becoming a lot less doable… As a matter of fact it is something of a miracle that any processes get finished at all…
Usually we have our own 'favourite' moments where we stumble (and sometimes fall) in a process. Some people are great at planning (1), but not so great at actually doing the work involved in making them reality: they cannot find the right ingredients (2,3) or feel that the actual mixing too much hard work (4) and so they start planning a new project instead (1). Some do not have the patience to wait until their cake is ready (5) and take it out too soon (6), or they wait to long and burn their cake. Others make it to the manifestation phase (7), but forget to really make it their own or to enjoy their labour (8) and rest (9) before jumping into a new project again.
Luckily, help is at hand! Using this process model and various coaching techniques, it is possible to find the individual key moments where a person tends to get stuck in his of her processes. These key points are very often related to subconscious beliefs and / or suppressed (instinctive) emotions, such as anger, grief, shame or frustration. The good news is that these beliefs and emotions can be seen, felt and integrated, thereby allowing for an overall smoother ride through the land of projects and processes!
The upcoming weeks and months I will publish a series of Enneagram blogs. If you cannot wait and want to know more right now, check out my Enneagram pages and the information on Life Coaching on my website or book a personal Life Coaching session with me.
Questions and comments are always welcome! And by all means Share this blog, if you like what you are reading!